all posts, community, eczema, mental health, miscellaneous, mortality, parentings/things about baby and kids, women's health

old plans meet new horizons (aka what I do when the little one sleeps)

woman carrying baby near green trees
Photo by Shari Murphy on Pexels.com

In the past, I may have mentioned how I am obsessed with the fourth trimester and all things postpartum, or how when I was in my physical therapy doctorate program, I was interested in going into a women’s health specialty.

After I left the program, I searched for ways to slowly transition into the women’s health field from a different angle. And so from April through October 2018, I worked as a women’s health information specialist for Dr. Brianne Grogan, a women’s health PT and health and wellness coach and the creator of FemFusion Fitness. It was one of those random connections that seems fortuitous- in fact I had contacted her years ago after reading her book (way before I even had applied to PT schools) because I was interested in learning more about women’s health.

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My job for her entailed handling email inquiries from women trying to understand

  • what was going on with their bodies
  • what content Bri had out, and
  • who they should see (doctors, PTs, etc).

I also worked on various projects like helping make distributable content for bone building exercises, and I collected research for her new topics. On occasion I did some help with audience outreach to get her free content out into the world.

In time though we amicably went our separate ways. She moved on to focus more on holistic health practices and less on women’s health physical therapy and rehabilitation specifically, and so I continued on in my own direction, which at the time mostly included prepping for my baby’s arrival into the world. Working for Bri was an awesome opportunity because not only is she the nicest, but I got to brush the cobwebs out of my brain about women’s health rehabilitation and really delve into the subject (if you haven’t checked it out already, her youtube is full of free videos of explanations and exercises that cover a gambit of topics like prolapse, diastasis recti, pelvic pain, etc. Check it out here).

Afterward having my baby, I had not lost the love for the fascinating field of women’s health, I merely needed time to rethink how I could enter the world as a professional, no longer coming from the physical therapy realm.

I had been contemplating the idea of becoming a postpartum doula for a long time, and I finally realized what I was missing in that thought process. My objective couldn’t be simply to become a traditional postpartum doula because I would always have to explain about my skin condition, that I’m not contagious, what that means for my services, and work around my own flares and down time. But in reality when I was thinking about my own limitations, I should have been thinking about who could relate to having them. This led me to thinking about those expecting, new, or seasoned moms that have to live with eczema or other chronic conditions (shoutout to all the spoonies out there!) while growing/raising a babe or two (or three or more), and what their needs might be.

It’s not uncommon for people with chronic illnesses to have higher rates of depression, and it’s not uncommon for moms to suffer from postpartum depression, so what about those unlucky ladies that get hit with both? How do they find a support system that bridges both gaps, knowing that some of their depression comes from living with an incurable condition, and the other from being steamrolled with new hormones and emotions as a new life blends into theirs? That is a demographic I feel has not been studied or served enough. And so, I have begun to slowly pull my own experiences (both personal and professional) to better understand and then serve this group. I have been working on merging three of my interests to accomplish this:

  1. postpartum education (e.g my postpartum doula course and my position researching and writing postpartum mental health pieces),
  2. community engagement projects (two in the works: one to help educate mamas of color who may face discrimination from the medical/healthcare world or not have access to it at all, and one about how to train churches to better serve new moms in their area), and
  3. volunteering more with the National Eczema Association. This helps me to be in the know about what policies are being created (or challenged), as well as what new treatments or practices are out.

I use these three directions to help understand my own struggles, as well as figure out how I might work to help mothers out there like me (or other parents/caregivers!). It also gives me more reasons to continually I brush up on healthcare policies, systemic support options, familial/community building techniques, measurable outcome scales, all manner of recent research and studies, etc, which I tend to like to peruse anyway.

I have also been exploring the other side of my interests- traditions and cultures around death. Soon I will be taking Alua Arthur’s End of Life training and learn how to best serve individuals and their families around their time of dying. I think it’s such a taboo thing that we really need to talk about more. The amount of people with traumatizing stories and feelings of regret around their loved ones times of dying is astounding, and historically many cultures prevented this by being present and accepting death as nature, not some scary thing never to be spoken about. As Alua says “talking about sex won’t make you pregnant. Talking about death won’t make you dead.”

I think talking about mortality brings up some important conversations (even just with oneself) about the relative value of our day to day decisions. Interestingly enough, many of my postpartum books now overlap with my study of death. I recently read Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time by Briget Schulte and it had multiple mentions of how mortality was regarded over the years, and how that was reflected in how we approach our day to day lives, including our aggressive work-above-all work culture today. The logic is, if you think about your mortality to a normal moderate amount, you make choices that are more centered around your mortality. We aren’t talking about the “YOLO” ideology, but rather decisions such as ‘maybe you don’t need to take that extra late business call that’s not really mission critical in lieu of spending time with your loved ones’, and that kind of logic.

Oh that reminds me- I did recently finish a class through Mothering Arts about how to create a community supported postpartum space that I really enjoyed. It offered lots of insight in how to welcome in new mamas as well as community “grannies” and draw-in local professional women to offer their expertise to the moms. My only rub is that I want to create a larger scale space than that demographic (though not necessarily a large number of people at one time). I want to create a space (maybe a physical community shop) that welcomes everyone is to have discussions, seek community, find aid… almost something that mixes time banks, death cafes, postpartum meet-ups, with a part-time bartering system, all wrapped into a welcoming looking shop. I get inspired by places like HausWitch though my target audience is slightly different.

Obviously my long term goals are still being constructed, but I think one day I would like to own this type of shop with my sister (who is paving her career in graphic design/UX and my best friend (who is a social worker), offering classes and discussions, innovative tech, and community services centered around the biggest times of change (birth/postpartum, and death). We also want to raise families together so working together would give us the time and space to figure out how to make it all work. ❤

On the book front, I’m currently reading Witches of America by Alex Mar which I’m finding so inspiring. It’s not that I want to be a witch per se, but I love learning about different routes of beliefs and what draws people to them, and Mar explores this topic so well.

Anyway, as the colder months approach, I’m in the hibernation phase of life again. Lots of reading, snuggles with the little one, obsessions with soups, teas, and decaf lattes. My family and I are moving soon, which is a new adventure on its own because we are finally leaving Massachusetts, but is a lot of mental overload on how to move across multiple states (any advice is welcome). The move might be hugely impactful on my skin too because I think my condition gets worse in the fall due to a mold allergy (and fall here is pretty moldy!). I’m actually friggin’ psyched to be moving- but more on that another day.

 

all posts, eczema, miscellaneous

hello 2019!

photo of person holding sparkler
Photo by Malte Lu on Pexels.com

Hello hello and welcome to a new year!

I promptly abandoned my blog for a few weeks because things got crazy. We found an apartment in the city (the city proper! I’ve never lived in a city city before), got all the background checks done, hosted my parents and Jake’s parents and my sister for Christmas, packed up the house and moved out (more or less), moved into our new place, and have been rearranging and unpacking and cleaning it since. It’s a bit of a downsize from our house (but that’s not saying much as our house was huge for us) so we’ve had to get rid of lots of stuff. It’s shocking how much extra junk you accumulate just because you have the space. We are taking measures to not repeat that behavior in the apartment, and its smaller size should help.

How have you all been? How is your skin fairing?

For me personally I had a few waves of flares but now I am officially in another flake out phase. I got some idiopathic hives the other day, which according to this study, are signs of healing, along with excessive sweating. I am finding myself to be sweatier at night and sometimes randomly during the day so hopefully that bodes well. Also my skin is getting more soft and skin-like again. Even Jake has noticed. This feels quite exciting!!

I’ve been thinking a lot of about healthcare and treatments for eczema, and medicine as a field in general when I came across this article from 2014 done by the National Eczema Association that embodied some of my thoughts about the care around topical steroid withdrawal (or topical steroid addiction, TSA). The discussion section of the paper brought up a lot of interesting points, including:

Some patients believe their eczema will heal only if they never use TCS. In fact, this healing may happen because atopic dermatitis has a tendency of self-healing, and possibly TCS use may disturb this self-healing process… Did the number of patients with adulthood atopic dermatitis increase after dermatologists began to prescribe TCS several decades ago?

This is so important to think about because it does make you wonder if topical steroids are necessary to treat eczema early on (when it’s acute and not severe). Or have we as a species been warped into this idea of needing flawless-looking skin, causing us to apply whatever to our skin to make it look good, regardless of the consequences? If you think about it, we are the same species that has invented spray-on tans, skin whitening creams, chemical blemish removers, etc to use even when our skin is functionally perfect but does not meet the notions set in our head of what we believe we are dermally supposed to look like.

And the question of whether or not the number of people with AD has increased since the advent of TCS prescriptions is dead on with what I have been obsessed with trying to figure out. Now, I admit that I straddle a weird line in my head between being totally into medicine and its innovations for human health, and being a completely off-the-charts ‘let’s return to nature, cuz nature knows best’, roll -around-in-the-mud-to-build-up-your-immunity type person. Yes, it’s a confusing place in my mind, but in reality it just makes me question anytime anyone on either end of the medicinal spectrum (allopathic to holistic) tells me “this is the right thing to do”.

As such, I still wonder if our species’ conquest to protect ourselves from the baddest of bad germs, and our inventions of things like pasteurization and homogenization, have unintentionally messed us up because we are now too sterile and our bodies don’t spend the necessary time attacking pathogens, and instead have all this time to turn on us, and find fault in things they shouldn’t find fault with, with each successive generation feeling it worse and worse.

But how do I reconcile these kinds of thoughts in my own head? Do I only drink raw cow’s milk, and refuse to drink anything commercially produced FDA-approved milks? No. Does it mean I try to create a balance of bacteria by including less commercial and sterile food and drinks in my diet (e.g. kombucha, kefir, sauerkraut, yogurt)? Yes.

With the skin stuff, a similar attitude prevails. Lots of sources say you shouldn’t take hot or long showers/baths, and that you shouldn’t even bathe daily especially if you are trying to let your skin heal (since bathing is innately drying to the skin). This goes against the common cultural attitude that we as humans should be bathing everyday and it’s gross if you don’t. Does this mean I question when people tell me I need to shower daily, even after I’ve done nothing but sit on a couch for a day and haven’t sweat at all? Yes. Does it mean I refuse to shower for days at a time, even when I know I smell bad or have exerted myself and sweated? No.

I personally do shower daily these days, mostly to help rid myself of dry skin that’s flaking off. However, I rarely use soaps (too harsh on my skin), and instead I bathe in various things a few times a week (apple cider vinegar, really diluted bleach, epsom salt, etc). Actually, I’ll tell you a secret. Neither me nor my husband uses shampoo or conditioner anymore. I’m mixed race, so my hair is dry anyway and shampoo has always been a cultural no-no, but my husband is white and at first his hair was greasy when he discontinued shampoo. But now, it’s not. Over time his hair adjusted as his scalp stopped producing so much oil since he wasn’t constantly washing it away. Neat huh?

Also, though I won’t flesh out the details unless it happens, I also have something new in mind for the Feral Scribbler. Call it a New Year’s resolution… though it’s not tied to this year and isn’t a new idea, and I don’t really do new year resolutions… but besides all that, it is definitely something exciting. So cross your fingers for the surprise to be realized and stay tuned. My only hint is it would potentially address an idea from within today’s post.

And with that mystery instated, I bid you adieu and wish you well into our new year.

 

REFERENCES

Fukaya M, Sato K, Sato S, Kimata H, Fujisawa S, Dozono H, Yoshizawa J, Minaguchi S. Topical steroid addiction in atopic dermatitis. Drug Healthc Patient Saf. 2014; 6: 131-138.

Sheary B. Topical corticosteroid addiction and withdrawal – An overview for GPs. Australian Family Physician. 2016 Jun; 45(6): 386-388.